Forgiving Fate

Can you see my razors? Can you see my blades?
Can you see my broken dreams cutting and tearing holes in my side,
Water gushes out, I'm hardly nailed to my own cross
I wander around through my self proclaimed revelry,
I amuse and bemuse in several million attempts to confuse
Can you see my blood-thirsty, dream-consuming insatiable appetite for sadness,
The world needs sadness and much as it needs A God
Can I fare any better? Or is this my one and only best?
Rain pours on these scenes, washing my cuts out for a new outpouring of velvety obscure grief
Sing me praises I say, See through my phases my father bays,
I cannot be blinded but only my blindness seems to save the world
Screams entwined in the cracking of bone, I watch myself through my crown of thorns
Self worship, Self worship, I hate you as much as I wish I could hate myself tenfold,
Wait! I scream as I know my future was never really unknown
Glass shatters and I am chemically induced to the whinings of God's machine
Manifestations of an obscure gestalt conspiratorial tommorow,
Unconcious is how I wish to have lived,
Concious of the unconciable would make me a demi in God,
I live in the present as I forget the past and only pretend to understand a future
I am a chain link fence in a barbed wired world,
I am an angel when a God is needed
I am never truly what I wished I am needed for,
Forgive the wolves, I hope they saved my four chambered glass made heart